10) “Awww…too bad. Just wait til you hear what happened to ME.”
09) “I always wondered what you guys had in common, anyway.”
08) “Oh good. I never liked him anyway.”
07) “Really? So…can I get his phone number from you?”
06) “I hated the way he sniffed/wagged his finger/squinted at you. I hope you don’t get back together.”
05) “What were you thinking, anyway?”
04) “I’m sure his next girlfriend will be better suited for him.”
03) “I’m sure one day you’ll look back on this and laugh.”
02) “Thank GOD. I’m sick of being the only single one.”
01) “That’s too bad…I’ve got this friend that I think would be PERFECT for you.”
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Top 10 Excuses for Breaking up with Someone
10) “Go back to your mama. I know she misses you.”
09) “I’ve realized I have better conversations with my cat.”
08) “Leaving your underwear at my house so I could wash it for you was the last straw. Get out, and take your underwear with you…it’s clean.”
07) “Have you ever heard of flowers, mother fucker?”
06) “It’s not you. It’s the guy next door.”
05) “I can’t wait anymore for you to pull your head out of your ass.”
04) “It’s not you. It’s just everything about you.”
03) “It’s not you. It’s the sight of you.”
02) “I’m seeing someone else. Okay, I’m not. But it’s still over.”
01) “It’s over. You’re stupid.”
09) “I’ve realized I have better conversations with my cat.”
08) “Leaving your underwear at my house so I could wash it for you was the last straw. Get out, and take your underwear with you…it’s clean.”
07) “Have you ever heard of flowers, mother fucker?”
06) “It’s not you. It’s the guy next door.”
05) “I can’t wait anymore for you to pull your head out of your ass.”
04) “It’s not you. It’s just everything about you.”
03) “It’s not you. It’s the sight of you.”
02) “I’m seeing someone else. Okay, I’m not. But it’s still over.”
01) “It’s over. You’re stupid.”
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